Why? What Why?

I desperately need to make more sales while the iron is hot
Because the financial year end is coming..
And I remember the reminder to work the ass off before the financial year ends.
I need the sales
Because I felt like the rest of the 12 people down there harps on me for better wages
And I have the burden to be able to provide
I need sales
Because I heard if one do well in sales, they get their additional incentives
And momma looks like she needs a new juicer.
It aint easy to juice 12 orange manually ;(
My make up are sponsored, my accessories are sponsored, and sometimes my meals too are sponsored.
I need sales if i want to be able to afford things un-sponsored
I simply need sales
Because that is my job designation
And I need no more counselling
To be reminded that I need more sales
Because it makes me sad to know I can't do justice to what have been rewarded to me
It makes me feel like dying
Hence I need the sales...

I hate sales
But I know I need sales
Its a complicated love-hate relationship that I have developed
I pursued with no hatred, just grudges sometimes
But I know it is a joy when sales are achieved
I know I am of no good
Neither here nor there, this or that

I don't know
Maybe I am good
But I think I am no good
I wish I was good
I wish I can see how good I am
But maybe I am just not that good after all
I don't know
Because I follow suit all that is given
That I no longer know if I am good or of no good
But in general I assume you deduce I am of no good

I broke down
Not because I a tired of facing slugs in the cubicles where I am seated
I broke down
Not because I cannot cope with things that are going on
I broke down
Not because I am not able to handle situation
I broke down
Because I am not able to learn from a situation
But on another note,
I could have broken down
Simply because I am just not as good

My words do not correlate with my heart
I know
My mind do not correlate with my hands
I know too
I no longer find correlation in me
Perhaps that explains why it took me so long to get acquainted with my classical dance steps
perhaps I am just fickle
Or perhaps I should just keep it shut

Whatever sorrow that comes
When the cow comes mooing
and when the cowboys come home
I know
That tomorrow is a another day
To face, to live while hoping I can drown my sorrow
By being a better person ;(

On a lighter note, I hope the people from Gardenia do google and notice that I have been junking eating healthily on all sorts of Gardenia buns in the Shell petrol station everywhere around town. As of today, I've had the whole Gardenia range for breakfast, lunch and almost-dinner to curb my hunger pangs and to put a control in the financial strain I've been having.
It would be great if Gardenia Incorporated would consider in sponsoring me a year intake of all sorts of Gardenia buns. That would ease my fodd funding pretty much. In return, I could do you a review in this humble little blog? Yes, I need sponsored meals. Pretty please... ;(