Yesterday I was someone. But I always thought that I am Suetha the Indian Classical Dancer. Then today I am Suhana. Day before I was Suet Mun. Welcome to my alter ego page..

Yours truly,
Suhana Suetha

Monday, March 25, 2013

Money No More

This is what I have spent my money on for the past couple of week. Not one Jinafire, but I got Jinafire a few more friends too -_-

Gotten Frankie Stein (left) for RM79.90 and Laguna Blue (right) for Rm59.90

I seriously need to stop spending like a diva! Many a time I forgot how lucky am I to even be living life with more than the basics that I have in life. I have been lining up at the ATM for almost every alternate day! This is serious :(

This is the complete 3rd week at work. Down with ONE and only appointment and many more to go till I get a big one for the first quarter of the year. I don't know about any other profession, but doing sales is never as easy as anyone can think of.  In fact, it's as difficult as a perspiring surgeon. You can't just dig down to the core in a breeze. There is just so many layers to go through just to get to the core of the problem. In my case, the many obstacles to go thru just to get half a million out of some companies' funding ;(

Sometimes if I wonder my mum's constant swearing towards me will have any effect on me. Her constant nagging that I am not filial to her and that I treat her badly really does make me wonder, if I am really that bad? It really didn't make things any better when she swear that I will not do well at work Who is going to pay for the house and living if I fare badly at work madam?

I don't think my pissed gesture of wanting to leave when she expect the handphone sales people to pick all the 32 ringtone one by one in the loudest tone for her to choose as her ringtone of the newly purchased phone (I bought!) is over-reacting.

Anyway, I am going to let this go and hopefully, tomorrow I am at least 2.5% more filial than yesterday. Happy?

It has also come to my sane mind finally to really do something about my personal finance now. From now onwards, every single cents spent will be taken note into that 555 notebook without fail! Because I cannot justify why am I always left with a mere RM20 in my wallet ;(

A look into the stash of receipt in the purse didn't relieve much stress. I practically spent money on an Aldo heels, road tax and insurance for the car, 2 new tyres for the car (yes, punctured again!), a pretty expensive phone for myself, another phone for mum and a couple of Chatime session and expensive lunch in this goddammit business area. RM5.90 for a cup of green tea!! Talk about direct bankruptcy!

It is now 11.43pm on a hot Sunday night. Tomorrow, I shall do what a salesperson should do ; be thick faced and make more sales lead!! Better hope that those curses from mum won't work :/

a yoga stance a day to keep sane
Pose : Dhanurasan - not perfect ;(

Friday, March 22, 2013

Crushing Candy, Crunching Data

Am at level 50 in my Candy Crush and a pathetic level of infancy @work.
This is a coming 3rd week to this journey of travelling remotely far to reach to a destination that is as noisy as a war zone during the peak period. And at times when there is a need for conversation to go on without a full stop in order to make a strong statement that what have been said and analysed out from a piece of conversational debate with the other person on another line is indeed true and nothing but the truth.

Sharing the same wake up time as the rooster is definitely not doing much to help me regenerate new skin cell.
The after lunch hour period is a torture! Nothing seems to function well most of the time. I can't spell. I can't look straight into anything. I am not able to listen with much intent. Yes, I am dozing off at work.. not because it is so free and easy that I was assigned to embrace the world with nothing.

It's been a while that I am working in a proper working environment. The last time I was tied to a bunch of heterosexual, I thought that was the perfect working scene. Till I realise I lost myself. And my very own personal time for a whole 6 years.

The feeling of leaving these stash of complicated excel sheet with magical templates that allows auto refresh is pretty much visible. Not a good sign. I hope it's just temporary. Because I know I am good. Well, I should be! And I better be. Am hoping these negative thoughts will quickly diminish each day I wake up. It did, till I am seated and this dilemma of making calls amidst a very noisy background. And yes, I am fussy. Sorry.

On another note, Puchong.... a place with a lot of food.. And people. Urghh... Just what I hate. Civilization dominated by hungry Asian.

I've discovered this nook opposite the office that sells onigiri. Reminded me of Japan and living in isolation, eating on your own and get on with life. I suspect I could be having mid-life crisis -_-

2 of this makes a full lunch

Breakfast set for RM3.90!

I have so little hours left in a day for any OOTD =(
Not to mention I am in the midst of stocking up more new work clothes, the only happy part of life -_-

Black chiffon cape from Cocktails Martini!

It have just turned midnite now and I am sleepy. Again. Like a cursed cycle of wanting to hibernate. 
Tomorrow... is another great day, to again look into those excel sheet with magical formulas. Again ;(

Monday, March 4, 2013

Wake Up

I get super guilty and sinful whenever I am reminded of how I failed my duty as filial daughter. 
Sometimes we tend to overlook a lot of things in life.
It is true. Life itself is tiring.
I wish mum knew that I had a long day, looking at figures of the past 5 years and figured enough to only fit info into a piece of paper. Having to deal with people who keep calling for payments, payments and payments.

Now that I am embarking on something else, which is nothing better than before and travel from north to south just for a meagre salary to survive, I wish she could also shut up.

I did the best I could to wake up before to the sky is bright and eliminate her need to travel with public vehicle. to work. And here she is, standing at the gate with her bag and looking pissed. Because I was not early enough for her. She needs to get out by 6.15am. Because she is one who is impatient, according to her. And with me leaving at 6.45am and reaching at 7.20am, she is still not happy about it. Because she don't like to rush for work. Work start at 9am by the way. WTF.
She don't get it why I have to leave half an hour later than what she expected. Told her because I reach office at 7.50am despite leaving at 6.45am. Work starts at 9am by the way. The admin girls comes in nothing earlier than 8.50am.

It's petty. really petty. I wish I have my palms on her face. it would do much to calm me down. And perhaps wake her up.
Yes, I know... I am crude. Try to be in this 600 square feet confinement and live my life here.

I am tired ;(

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